the question

Ms or Mrs?

"Miss or Missus?" He asked in a monotone, raising his head slightly from the form he was filling out. I was at a path lab to get a series of blood tests done to rule out malaria, typhoid, meningitis and jaundice. Okay, the last three were not on the doctor's prescribed list. The question lifted my spirits a little. Staying at home, exhausted by frequent fever and diarrhoea, does not bring much cheer. I thought, "Wow, he thinks i am still young enough to be a miss even though I have a nine-year-old son". He looked impatient and i quickly said, "missus". He wrote 'Mrs', followed by my name. But I am no longer a 'Mrs', I am a 'miss' again. Am I not divorced? It's so easy for guys. It's just 'Mr'. No one looks at a 30-year-old and asks, "Mister or master?" And anyways, Isn't writing 'Ms' politically correct for both Miss and Mrs? Before I could say I am actually a 'Ms again', he spat out the next question. "How many children?" Plural?! He thinks i am a mother of more than one child. My spirits deflated. "Only one", I said shortly sucking in my breath and tum trying to look like a yum mum. Blood delivered, I went to the X-ray department. "Married or single?" asked the attendant. I peeked; there was no other option on the form. No 'divorced/separated/ widowed/single-again/old-maid'. I said single. She looked at me suspiciously. So I told her I was married but not any more. I could see her confusion. Her colleague chipped in and chose Ms. The Ms vs Mrs dilemma, I found, dogged the single-again lot everywhere. At school PTAs, at airline ticket counters, at insurance offices, anywhere where a form was handed out. The women and child development ministry may want to rectify this anomaly too while it is trying to get adultery off the criminal angle. Indians love asking strangers personal questions. So colleagues or acquaintances randomly ask you, 'what does your husband do?' And if you decide to mention the 'd' word — divorced — voices drop, expressions take on a mournful look, and it's almost as if they are suddenly grieving. Then you can either play along or put them at ease with a smile that prompted the lab guy to ask Miss or Missus?